Friday, August 14, 2009

My Left Foot

My left foot has begun to drag. I guess that's what they call "foot drop." This seems, unlike many other medical terms, perfectly descriptive. Nonetheless, I am more inclined to call it obstinate. The same way my father used to call me obstinate. I have to keep looking behind me to see if the foot is still coming along. Yo, get with the program, I will say, and yet the foot persists in its recalcitrant ways, and finally begins to pout. I'm thinking of sending it to military school. Either that or church camp.

In the meantime, my neurologist has left his practice for a teaching position at UCLA. Maybe he could take my foot along with him? If not, it will just have to wait for a new neurologist sometime in the dim future (the clinic is looking for one--no doubt under rocks and in other nooks and crannies, as this, I think, is where they are most often to be found).

Also my back is aching like a SOB. This, however, is not due to MS. It is due to the fact that my chair is too low and my desk is too high. It is an ergonomic problem, and I cannot really figure out what to. I am thinking of either raising the floor or lowering the ceiling. Or sitting on a phone book. Or sawing off the legs of the desk. There are a number of options, all of which are presently under consideration.

Concomitantly, I am trying to beat the standard line count, which is how we transcriptionists earn incentive pay (which the IRS in turn takes in taxes). My foot has no objection to this pursuit, but my back does not care for the idea at all. My back, as it were, is stabbing me in the back, and has become, therefore, as obstinate as my foot.

The rebellion of the body, part by part. Ain't that what MS is all about?

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