Saturday, October 25, 2008

Not a Cure for the Common Cold

It so happens that I came down with a cold yesterday. I had hoped to avoid this, despite the sneezing, coughing, hacking, drooling presence of my infected family members. My neurologist, after all, had told me that people with MS are less like to contract common illnesses since our immune systems are overactive, attacking not only the things that are not supposed to be swimming around in our bodies, but the things that are as well.

So, the first thing my wife asked, upon seeing that I had come down with the cold, was whether I had taken my shot. What has this to do with anything? Does she imagine that the interferon will kill the cold virus? Best thing for that cold is a stiff shot of poison! If interferon was a cure for the cold, surely they'd have lemon flavored lozenges available, or some kind of stuff you spray up your nose.

Yeah, I took my shot, all right. That's why I'm feeling like the walking dead. Little does she know, apparently, that my shot makes the cold worse than it would have been if left to itself.

The next morning our friend Albert calls.

"Man, you sound lousy," he says. "Did you take your shot?"

The shot again. What's up with the shot?

"Oh, I thought it kept you from getting colds and stuff," he explains. "I'm sure your wife told me that."

I figure next time he feels a cold coming on, I'll loan him a pre-filled syringe. Bottoms up, Buddy.

No comments: