Wednesday, November 12, 2008

All Considered, Zombies Are Worse Off

It takes but a little to result in a lot. I find this to be especially true where MS symptoms are concerned. As long as I maintain a general composure of vegetation, I do pretty well. When called upon to exert myself however, in mind or in body, I experience an almost immediate awakening and activation of disabilities that had been merely at rest.

Why are zombies so slow? Maybe because they have MS in addition to all their other problems. Being dead, for instance, is bound to slow you down a bit. MS just makes being dead a little worse.

I walk slowly. People think that I'm really laid back. The truth is my body is just conserving energy that will soon need to be applied to one task or another.

I cogitate deliberately. I stare into space, eyes fixed in apparent deep rumination, chin in hand, statue like. But I'm not really thinking at all. I am merely trying to think. There is no profundity being discovered unless trying to remember where I parked my car can be called profound.

This morning I had to carry my keyboard upstairs and then rearrange some pieces of furniture downstairs, and by the time these simple tasks had been accomplished (perhaps 15 minutes or so) my legs were aching and wobbly, my breath short, my arms sore, my face hot. It felt like having just finished an interlude of rough sex, only without the sex part.

And so now I've slumped back into the vegetative state, here at Starbucks, I and my cappuccino. We're having company for lunch today, and I am doing the cooking. Get ready body, here it comes!

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