Rat

Caught two rats last night, one very small and one very large. The latter rat was as large as the trap itself - one of these sticky box traps, you know. Why these seem to be considered more humane than the classic snap and break their neck traps, I do not know. I mean, here's this poor, ugly, disgusting, giant rat struggling in a quagmire of glue most the night long, terrified and exhausted, I'm sure. I reckon the thing must have lost perhaps 10 pounds through its nightlong trial of futile escape attempts. By the time I found him and shut the trap, thus snuffing out his life, he had shrunk to the size of a poodle from all his struggles. Sad. But not too sad; for, if you can believe it, this guy actually got a package of Sozzis treats down off the top of the microwave - treats which I keep here for the big fat brown dog - and ate them, wrapping and all. And, in my book, that's going too far. And the big fat brown dog agrees. Of course, I discover now that they've been in the silverware drawer again, and this does not inspire sympathy either. Who's gonna wash all those utensils? Them? Fat chance.